Stop Look Notice

One of the (many) lessons that arrived (for me) with life experience

was the awareness & understanding that each day arrives and departs

"never to be lived again"

Initially that awareness distressed me. Profoundly.

Tho it wasn't news to the universe

or a concept I'd never considered

it arrived at mid-life as a point of reference

that I was foolhardy to ignore.

I felt immediately obligated even perhaps stressed

to layer even more

into my already frenetic days on the farm.

Exhausted, stressed and vexed it (eventually) occurred to me

that greater happiness was awaiting me 

not in greater quantity but deeper quality.

I came to understand that life was unfolding hour by hour

and the choice lay not in how much I could accomplish in each day

but rather how much I could - or would - choose to enjoy

within each moment of each day.

In other words, Live smaller

A phrase found often in financial advice and ecologic terms.

But I believe it applies to time also.

At least it does for me.....

My efforts to alter my perception and habits

 began as most do,  rather stintedly lol

Tho it was sometimes impossible, any day I could I reduced

my 'must do' list (which incidentally drove me insane initially)

That provided the window of time to

stop, look notice

to improve the quality of life

(akin to stop, drop and roll for fire)

When grocery shopping I forced myself to notice

the colors in the produce aisle

the artwork on the boxes.

(I admit, I was exceedingly self conscious,

& hoping no one noticed me standing & staring lol)

Hanging up laundry I made a point

of putting the basket down

and turning in a full circle

to absorb the view

of each season.

Slowly. Purposefully.

Soul-filling-ly

(less self consciously as only the birds were observing)

Each attempt I felt less absurd

Each time I gained a grain of renewal

Tho I accomplished less each day

my world did not unravel.

 While fewer items were crossed off

my mental or actual 'to do' list my

previously frenetic world did not end.

Amazing...

Over time I increased my number

of

stop, look, notice

exercises

and as the week and months passed

two astounding truths emerged:

*I was still accomplishing a tremendous amount*

*I was happier than I had ever been*

when I strived only for efficiency

Astounding yet again

Eventually I began to think of each day

as a scavenger hunt 

What could I see or hear that I'd previously

passed by in my 'oh-so-efficient' days?

So simple these efforts to notice detail

surrounding the flow of moments in my days

 yet so rewarding.

And an amazing easing of the pressures

of life of doom/gloom/stress

 of sadness/worry/angst

accompanied this change in focus

I was applying to most of my days.

Moving forward to the farm years

and the future as it continues to unfold:

Always, always my camera is in one pocket

my notepad and pen/pencil in the other

I delve deeper still via image and words

into the scavenger hunt....

Seeking he viewed but not observed sights

catching the heard but not listened to sounds

for myself, for sharing here with you

Magic for the taking

Held within

each and every

day

of

life

around me.....

And I grow more contented still

Of course there are days, weeks that demand my

undivided attention and times that cause stress.

Those times are part and parcel of being a

responsible connected bill paying human.

But here is my hope....

  perhaps one person finds these words

locates a thread of truth within them

and learns sooner than I did

to stop, look and notice

their world

To that person

I say:

Here's to finding yourself

standing somewhere

self consciously

looking & seeing

& seeking...

Photo and text copyright FIDF 2012